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Oct 24th reflections plus thoughts

posted Oct 24, 2009, 7:13 AM by sina@projectvolunteering.net

There are many thoughts waiting to be stated here.

I want to say THANK YOU to Dan, Theresa, Nathalie and Tau for your sweet comments and the huge smile they left on my face!

I want to report on my reflections about this place, myself, the universe and mankind.

today is the 16th day of my project volunteering full time existence. You can read what I thought before I came (scroll down...). Ill sum it up – I was quite enthusiastic. todaz also is the 24th and im finally posting.

I  am smiling.

What I want to adress is -

do I give as much as I want to give and share? Am I reflecting as much as I want, am I personally growing in the way I want to? Are we as a community, are we as friends, growing?

The first week I enjoyed a lot of time and energy here. I felt confronted with the concepts and problems of responsibility, sensibility, social overload (what I would call that state when you just cant talk anymore, because you just had way too much of everything), frustration, communication, hope, and so on and on. Each of these concepts I want to treat deeply with time and thought documenting their development. Not tonight though.

I met lots of new people and, of course in varying ways, I saw light in all of you them us whatever. Meaning – there are / we are / so many beautiful souls here filled with great and crazy ideas, presents, pasts, dreams, that it is overwhelming. BUT – overwhelming in a most positive way. I see an incredible amount of potential.

Do we live up to our potentials ? Do you? Do I?

Lets work on it.

The second week, I spend a lot less time here than during the first. My university started, and I have fallen into a deep obsession with my classes, classmates, teachers and papers. I love it. I can feel everyday how my horizon widens, how my thoughts become clearer, my mind more focussed. This is majorly important for me. It is changing my life.

Being gone so much, I tried being here as sensitively as I could, thinking, less time, more deepness. This led to the point that my only quiet reflection time became those 50 minutes I spend on the train towards or from Uni, plus sleeping (I strongly believe in subconscious reflections during sleeping periods). That is not enough. In order to live more consciously, I need to take more time for reflecting. (first personal goal for the rest of my life)

Good topic. Personal goals.

I want to give a workshop soon, the idea for the topic at this point is the concept of roles in society and in our personal lifes. I have been discussing an interesting text in class about acters and how they represent the utmost human nature of presenting themselves constantly, and it opens the question, whether we ever are natural (or whether acting itself is more natural), and it aims at becoming more conscious of roles we imply for ourselves and others in our everyday lives. If I find some of you are interested in this as well, I am working on structuring it into a nice introduction for a discussion.

I want to start many workshops afterwards, because I am in love with this concept. I want to participate in more. I want to propose to have more workshops following Claytons idea – talk about your personal goals, your expectations and feelings, why you are in the project, etc (though I wasnt actually there when it happened and dont know how it turned out, but I like the idea, plus it adds on to knowing more about each others motivations)

Basically this adresses to what may have said and felt in the last weeks – to be in a more frequent interaction with each other. As a dayly meeting failed in happening, frequent workshops could be an idea.

Theresa and I want Keinst to help us make Pizza for everyone SOON.

I want to start thinking about a new place, but I still have to deal with becoming a berlin resident and some how-to-borrow-money-from-your-government first.