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Some more thoughts about recent issues and people staying in this flat

posted Jul 2, 2009, 4:22 PM by tau@projectvolunteering.net   [ updated Jul 3, 2009, 12:07 AM ]
Many people were present today when we had a discussion specifically about Tyler staying in the flat for another night when he already had been told that we didn't have space here. We have a Latvian family of 5 or 6 that has been put to the PCR by Paul at least for tonight and then in the next days if the room is not taken. We also have 2 danish people that also Paul invited. We have my cousin Julio and his friend girl. We have Maria who is willing to stay for the month but for now she is seeing if she likes it. We have Russ from brooklyn and we have more people coming tomorrow. Anick is still here.

Apparently it was all of us Anick, Daan, Clayton and me who clarified that Tyler was not going to have space for more that 1 day, but Jake extended his stay two more days and Tyler said nobody told him he had to leave. This situation seemed to me so unclear and disrespectful that I exploded into acusations in a too emotional way, but not for that less funded.

Finally it all went to nothing, Tyler is still going to stay against our will. Not only he seems to have been sneaking here from the first time I saw him, but also I have never seen him contributing in any flat or project related thing.

We specified before that no guests should be accepted over 1 week in advance unless special ocasions. One of the reasons for that was so that we all had the possibility to demand for a guest free time or attend to special needs. I am, right now, trying to actively communicate that the rythm in which Jake and Paul have been hosting is not sustainable for me at this point.

This specific discussion touched general problems and disconformities. It is very hard to take action of any kind in this place. I want to suggest talking as soon as possible about the peope who are not contributing to make this place better. I know the meeting is planned for tuesday but I think this should be discussed as soon as possible.

From the beginning of the project planning we distinguished between having many people coming to our project and many quality people. Right now this is for me very present, I prefer to be only 6 people or 7, but really commited people that have already learned to understand each other.

I would like to discuss about what do residents think about people like Jake living here. I personally don't think his contribution is positive. It is not so easy to talk to Jake because he has a special way of conversation where he is usually the only one talking. It is true that in some cases he has appeared to us very lucid, but in at least 2 cases he acted extremely rude or event violent to one of our guests and residents. It is also not possible to count on him on flat tasks or website activities because he doesn't make public what is he going to be doing any day of the week and I haven't seen him more than once cooking, and never cooking for more than 2 people. Also I don't remember him ever cleaning, I merely remember that he twice left the flat full of blue stains after he got bodypainted. I have to remark that most of the activities where Jake was involved that meant problems for the project, where in ocasions when he had drunk too much. In some periods Jake has been drunk everyday. In that ocasions he acts very excentricly and tries to absorb people's attention. Now recently he has been massively hosting people, at some point 7 people at at time and adding them too early to the calendar. That made very difficult for other residents to invite guests or friends.

I have communicated to Jake that I don't like his stay in our project because his lifestyle and interests are very different from what I and some of us had in mind when we started developing it. He replied he likes this place and he has a lot to give to it. Therefore he is willing to fight for staying. I would like to know how many people agree with this and try to find out if this is a general opinion or just my own perception.

I know there are problems with other people, who after living here for over 2 months did never contribute in basic things like cleaning or cooking. I am talking about Ula and Paul. In the case of Timmy, because his work takes place most evenings of the week, very often we don't have the perception of his presence or his contribution. For that it could seem that these people are not quality people but quanltity people. I dont want to make any judgement about this right now, because they have not caused major damage to the way the project is running. Some ppl might disagree with this.

I think that before some person moves into this flat, all the present residents should agree with it openly in one of the meetings. Any further insatisfactions should be presented in public as quick as they appear so no frustration acumulates further.

I have expressed publicly (unfortunately with tears in my eyes) that I am considering moving out of this place if things continue discouraging me like they do now. I have not yet decided anything, and I am not going to runaway and leave a mess after me. I have declared myself responsable of taking care of my friends happiness and will clean any mess before I take any independent desicion.

I would like our residents and guests to be quality people that have a reason to be here in our project, other that just staying in Berlin, drinking or partying. I would prefer to dedicate more space for fewer guests in order to let them feel confortable and manage to get to know more of them better. For this, I would like people to respect the limit of 10 guests that we set in a previous meeting.

I feel like most of this problems would not exist if we could be a little bit more selective with who is staying and living with us.

I hope you see this as a way to open dialog and understand each other as much as possible.

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